Hi, Elizabeth here. I know Maggie mentioned that we are having the stress from Jim because I suspect he had a mild heart attack and refuses medical attention.
This is what happened.
A couple of weeks ago, we got on the plane to Punta Cana, and about an hour into the flight, Jim slumped in his chair. The flight attendants happened to be coming around with drinks at the time. He looked at me and was somewhat disoriented, but his face was completely gray and he was sweating profusely. He said, “I don’t feel good. I don’t….feel good.” I immediately asked the flight attendant for help and the two of us got him up front near the restroom. I asked Jim if he thought he might be having a heart attack.
Jim’s knees buckled and he fainted for a brief few seconds. The flight attendant told me, “I can’t hold him myself” and I told her, “I have him on this side” but Jim regained consciousness. He was very unsteady and while the crew called for medical personnel who might be on the plane, I helped Jim into the restroom. He moved his bowels and felt better shortly thereafter.
In the meantime, a nurse was on board and gave Jim a motion-sickness tablet. The flight crew was considering diverting the plane but when Jim’s color came back to his face, they accepted his “no” and his “no” to having medical personnel on the ground.
Jim insists he had a panic attack. He very well may have. I fear he had a heart attack because he had all the symptoms. It’s been a couple of weeks and he still refuses to go to the doctor, even for my peace of mind and to get me off his back.
I’m depressed and terrified. Jim’s father died of congestive heart failure at the age of 67, I believe. I have done the unthinkable and called Jim’s brother and “told” on him. His brother, John, was very upset and gave Jim a talking-to, but so far, it’s been no good.
I realize that sometimes, men in particular have a hard time asking for help or facing what they perceive to be a weakness. This is a generalization that Jim fits in to. He’d rather “turtle down” than face something like this. All I want is for him to take a stress test or an echo test to see if there was any damage. I am upset and broken hearted at what I think is my husband’s selfishness of not taking care of himself. His brother Larry died of cancer at 62 and left his widow a wreck. I said to John, “Jim is going to do the same thing to me.”
I don’t like drama or making mountains out of molehills but really, all I want is for him to take the test. He has a regular doctor he likes and insurance, so I frankly don’t see what the problem is. I know that if the shoe was on the other foot he’d be screaming down my throat to get my butt to the doc. It just doesn’t seem right, and I’ve been very unhappy.
I’m afraid of everything at this point. We have the upcoming trip to Houston and I would feel so much better if I knew that Jim’s house was in order before we left. I’m afraid of him picking things up, or straining, or any and everything.
This is a very difficult time and Maggie and I may not blog as much as we’d like. Thank you for your support and understanding.
Your (sad) friend, Elizabeth