Tag Archives: angry

2/13/15 Soap Opera Kisses

As you can see, I’m out of the doghouse and back in Mom’s good graces.

playball

It turns out, Mom was angrier at me about scratching near Jamie’s eye than she was about the poopies. Mom said she can’t replace eyeballs but she can always clean up a mess. Jamie’s scratch is red and scabby today. I feel bad for scratching him. When he got the shoe away from me, I gave him a playful swat and hurt him. I guess that’s why people shouldn’t have tigers and stuff like that for pets. Mom’s not really calling Jamie “Scarface”, either. Well, maybe just once.

Last night, I lay down on Mom’s side of the bed near her pillow to try to make things up. When she managed to move me over a bit, I curled up in a tight ball next to her belly. She loves that, I know it. She put her arm around me and I swear I didn’t move a hair all night. Cuddles work every time!

Today, Mom went to the gym and to pick Jamie up from school, so she had to put me back in the crate. Mom always leaves the TV on for me – usually, she just turns on Channel 5 and lets me listen to the news and soap operas (since hearing human voices is soothing). I’ll tell you, I’m getting quite an education. For one thing, none of those humans on the soap operas seem to have jobs. If they do have a job, they just stand around and talk a lot. They also carry around a lot of empty drinks, and they are always going out to eat in restaurants with perfectly clean plates – no food in sight!

But what really gets me is that I always know when the humans are kissing – even if I can’t see the screen – because they make an obnoxious sound like someone eating a hot dog with their mouth open. Every time! Yuck!

Mom used to put “Animal Planet” on for me but the shows have changed. She also used to put on the Discovery Channel. Personally, I like the guy who narrates, “How It’s Made”. He’s got a very soothing voice. Of course, the best choice is for the humans never to leave the house and I never get put in the crate for any reason. But, that’s not going to happen!

At least everyone is all made up, just in time for Valentine’s Day.

Woof! Love, Maggie

10/3/13 Let Me Explain…

As you can imagine, I have been in Big Trouble since running away.  But I wasn’t gone for long!  That’s probably not cutting it, so let me explain.

It all started on Sunday, when Dad and Jamie fixed the fence.  I did my usual activities in the yard, flashmobbed the two workers, and played with Mom.  Everything fine as normal.

Monday and Tuesday, I spent a lot of time in the yard under Mom’s supervision.  She noticed that I was patrolling the fence.  Dad said he thought he had fixed all the spots and we would find out.  We did.

The fence is easy to manipulate.  It’s your typical, 4.5 foot chain-link fence, and if I take off at a run, I can usually bend a hole in the bottom of the fencing to escape.  Dad and Jamie had pounded tent stakes into the holes I had made in the fence, thereby sealing off my means of egress and firming up the bottom.

So late Tuesday afternoon, after studying the fence intently, I found a weak spot.  And, while Mom and Jamie watched from the front of the yard and before they could react, I backed up, took off with my powerful hind legs and Hairy Bullet-ed that fence.  I was free!

I have previously explained that our backyard is shaped like a slice of pie and slants upward to a small hill.  On the right (from the back door) are our neighbors, and to the left, is the woods.  Which is right next to the swamp, bordering our cul-de-sac in the front.  The neighbors put up a wooden fence, and the chain link is next to the woods.  So, into the woods I shot.

Mom and Jamie ran after me, calling me and pleading for my return.  In hindsight, it is not that I bolted out of the yard where I fell down in this story.  It’s when Jamie and Mom split up, Jamie to the swamp, Mom to the woods, and I SAW HER and SHE SAW ME and I RAN THE OTHER WAY…that’s where it got ugly.

Through the woods!  And the Poison Ivy!  And the trees with the thorns that are 2″ long!  Once I hit the swamp grass, which is dry because we haven’t had rain lately, but is about 3.5 feet tall, Mom couldn’t see me anymore.  Neither could Jamie.  All I’m going to say is, I didn’t realize that we had horses so close to us!  (They live on the other side of the swamp.)

Jamie trudged unhappily to the front of the house in defeat, and Mom ran in to call the Police and Animal Control.  Soon, however, I had had enough of Maggie’s Day Out and wearily walked across the front lawn, and allowed Jamie to grab my collar.  He hollered out that he had me just as the Operator was answering Mom’s call.

Mom was…blisteringly angry at me on so many levels!  Not so much that I escaped the yard, but that I did not respond to commands.  “What am I spending every !@#$ing Saturday at !@#$ing Obedience School with this ^&*(# dog for if she is NOT going to listen when it counts?!!” She explained to me that a Pit Bull running loose is not a smart idea, and that I could have been shot on sight (people don’t understand that I jump when I’m being friendly), also that they are just trigger-happy when it comes to Pits.  Or that a coyote could have gotten me – they grow large around here, and we have a pack of them in the woods – or someone could have picked me up, or I could have gotten Poison Ivy, or  trapped in the mud…you get the idea, Mom felt I was in danger.  And I put myself there just for fun.

Mom cleaned me up and put the training collar on me and the chain lead.  Now I rattle when I walk.  (She would use the nylon lead but I chew them up).  Mom wants to be able to stop me quickly if I do anything suspicious.  I also had to go to the Vet for a checkup, a shot, and get a bath.  But those are other posts.  I just wanted to tell everybody that I had a serious lapse of judgment, and I’m sorry. 

Last night, Mom finally cooled off a little and when I jumped into bed, I cautiously leaned up next to her.  She pat me on the back and I knew all was forgiven.  I gave a loud groan, rolled over onto my side, and pressed the entire length of my body up against her.  I sighed very loudly when Mom draped her hand across me.  Dad chuckled in the darkness and said, “It’s good to be on Mom’s Good Side!”

He’s right.

Love, Maggie