My humans decided to make a gingerbread house yesterday. Not just a gingerbread house, a gingerbread manor. The manor is about twice the size of an ordinary gingerbread house. Which, I would like to point out, I have never seen in my life and I don’t understand the point of building. But I would also point out that it smells delicious, and all the little things that fall to the floor – like bits of candy, flakes of sugar, and blobs of frosting, – are MINE. Whoo-hoo! Sugar HIGH! Buzz, buzz, buzz!
So Mom, who is half Christmas Elf, decides that this is going to be a Family Activity, turns off the football game (it wasn’t Dad’s team), flips on some Christmas music, and tells everybody else to go to work.
At first, it seemed OK. The huge house came with lots of frosting, and Erik and Jamie started building:
However, the house would not stay together, so Dad got involved:
Dad’s idea was to insert toothpicks into the house to keep it together while it dried. As Dad pushed a toothpick into one side, the other side fell over.
After about an hour and a half of this nonsense, Mom decided that it was time for her to Get Involved. Mom examined the icing and determined that it was too dry, and no one had the sense to say anything. While she was examining, the house was collapsing, and the bits of frosting gently fell to the floor, where I happily licked them up.
Mom then went to the all-knowing “Alton Brown”, and found a recipe for royal icing, which she quickly whipped up. She then took matters into her own hands as far as building the house. Total time so far: 3 hours.
The house was looking rather sorry, but Dad encouragingly placed some bits of candy on the roof to brighten it up. For every candy he placed, three fell on the floor for me to scarf up. By now, I was really revving! Jamie decorated the house with Earth moving equipment, and said it was still “under construction”. Mom said she had enough and it was time to go to bed.
Today, while Mom was getting ready for work, I decided to sniff around the house, which Mom had placed on a side table that stands about two and half feet high. CRASH!!! The house went over on its front, and I started slinking on the floor.
Mom was glad the house didn’t crack or shatter, and said it was a testimony to Alton Brown’s icing that there wasn’t much damage. After work she went to the store for more candy, and now the house looks like this:
In the front, and like this:
In the back.
Mom shingled the roof with little mints and added lots more candy. Dad said that I was the big helper with the house, since I not only cleaned up the mess on the floor, but if it wasn’t for me, it wouldn’t have been modified. See? I’m a helper dog!
Woof! (still spazzing from sugar) Love, Maggie